Lying Awake

some excerpts from a novel lent to me by Fr. Scott...

At last the child revealed himself to the poor giant as Christ, and he said, 'You carried the weight of the whole world on your back when you carried me.' Sometimes we all feel that way when we share Christ's burden, we feel we are drowning in the sorrows of the world, but if we ask God for the strength to endure for the sake of others rather than just ourselves, we discover how powerful love really is.
(re: our own messiness and that of the world...more of a realization after conversations with Fr. Scott)

Adoration welled up through the pain, closing the gap between lover and Beloved. The force of His presence curved eternity in on itself; it was not her love rising after all, but His love pulling her toward Him. She fell upward into brilliance, where all suffering was released.
(re: today at St. Dominic's as I watched a woman place her hands on the glass around the Blessed Sacrament...the drawing of her to Him...hearts giving and receiving...with all of us as we sat and knelt before Him)

Self had been an illusion, a dream.
God dreaming.
(re: Fr. Larry's lesson to me a year ago..."You are a thought of God...a heartbeat of God")

The entire life of a good Christian is in fact an exercise of holy desire. You do not yet see what you long for, but the very act of desiring prepares you, so that when He comes you may see and be utterly satisfied.
(re: why He allows me what I experience)

God means to fill each of you with what is good; so cast out what is bad! If He wishes to fill you with honey and you are full of sour wine, where is the honey to go? The vessel must be emptied of its contents and then be cleansed. Yes, it must be cleansed even if you have to work hard and scour it. It must be made fit for the new thing, whatever it may be.
(re: there can be no residue of the past...I must allow Him to cleanse and heal me completely without holding on anymore to what I need to let go of)

"There is no middle ground when it comes to loving God. It's all or nothing."
(re: AMEN)

Writing had become as important as prayer to her - it was her prayer...
(re: yeah, for me, too)